As churches are opening up again and people are slowly returning to their parishes, there is still much question about what to do. Some parishes are simply trying to return to the past programs. Other parishes are questioning whether they should do something different. They are offering new evangelistic programs with the hopes of getting people back not only to church, but to the life of the parish.

At the core of the issue, I believe, is the perception and belief of the average Catholic in the pew of what their identity is as a Catholic and the role of religion in their lives. There have been several books, offering new models for local parishes, that give voice to the current culture of parishioners in our pews. For example, in the book “Rebuilt”, the people are described as consumers since they have been formed by the culture they live in.

I believe there are many ways to describe the people in our pews and the struggle that parishes have in adapting to them. Personally, the description that I use most often is that of a country club member. My experience is that the average member of the Church sees their role in the local parish more as a member of a country club.

They come and pay dues (i.e. join the Church, get their sacraments and contribute to the collection, which nationally is about $5.00). They come and use whatever they need (go to Mass, get sacraments…) from the parish (country club), but offer nothing else beyond their dues toward the building of the community.

I believe that instead of adapting Church to the people, we need to preach/teach the truth by correcting the perceived identity of the people. This requires us to preach the entire Gospel of Jesus Christ. Out of fear of their rejection of the Gospel, we have been teaching them how to add a little bit of Jesus to their lives instead of teaching them that this relationship with God is all or nothing. The average Catholic that has grown up in the last five decades, has received a watered-down version of the Gospel.

The extra-curricular activities of the culture began to demand more time of the people. They, in turn, came to the Church and demanded less requirements.

“Hey Director of Religious Education, what is the least we have to do to get our kids the Sacraments?”

We sought the easy route. We Sacramentalized our people without ever leading them to encounter the Lord in their hearts (or evangelize to them). Thus, their view and understanding of being a member of a Church became sterile or secular. Sacraments were no longer avenues where we encounter the living God, they were dues for membership in the church. Along with that came the false belief that church membership and going to Mass gave them entrance into Heaven, or rather fire insurance from going to hell. Church became one of many activities that families have to do during their very busy week.

This is nothing new, we have all seen this reality happen before our eyes. But how has this transition affected the identity of the people regarding God? They hear in Mass that we are the Children of God, but most don’t believe that because they don’t live that way. They lack the personal encounter that evangelization brings. They lack the connection where love is shared with God.

Those who live that way see themselves as the hired hand in the parable of the Good Shepherd. The Good Shepherd gives all to the family business (the Sheep) because they belong to his Father. The hired hand runs away from the flock when the threat comes because they have no OWNERSHIP in the flock.

Most people in our pews, particularly those who only go to mass, see themselves as doing exactly what they were poorly taught to do. Be a good person, get your entrance sacraments, and go to Mass. But they lack the familial connection with the Heavenly Father, and they lack the understanding that their entire life should now be focused on building the Kingdom of their Heavenly Father on earth.

If we are honest, we would say that most of us have been working more to build our kingdom on earth than God’s. By this I mean we have worked to amass wealth for our needs and wants, so as to care for our families. Our major focus has been development and care of our families, not God and His Kingdom.

If God were to grab a sheet of paper and make list of things we have done to build the eternal kingdom of God outside our own families, what would be on that list?

Below, I have made a playful list to reveal the mindset I am speaking about.

You know you see yourself as a real member of the parish (God’s Kingdom) when:

• You make it a point to find a parish when you move to a new area.
• You prayerfully discern which parish you are going to join and do what God says.
• You register at the parish.
• You pray and ask God how much you should tithe each week/month.
• You see that your family must become a part of something more important than the family – God’s Family.
• You inquire at the parish to see how you can help.
• You prayerfully discern where God wants you to serve at the parish.
• You have opened your heart to God and received His Holy Spirit.
• You actually talk to people at Church.
• You make it a priority to develop relationships with people at church.
• You not there just to receive, but to serve.
• You’re walking in from the parking lot and see a piece of garbage on the ground and you pick it up.
• You go into the bathroom and find the sinks and garbage cans a mess and you clean them up.
• You understand the church is made up of sinners that need grace from God and you.
• You sin against a parishioner and you ask them for their forgiveness.
• You see your sins and know that they are preventing you from loving God more.
• You push past the shame of your sin and go to the Sacrament of Reconciliation regularly.
• You go to Reconciliation because you sense the loss of your relationship with God because of your mortal sin.
• You go to reconciliation because you feel remorse for the ways you let God down.
• You go to Mass because you want to be with Jesus, not because you have to.
• You go to Mass to thank Jesus for everything you have.
• You go to Mass because you really want to worship God.
• You have established a daily prayer life so that you can talk to God regularly.
• You have established a daily time to study scripture so you can learn the ways of God.
• You have joined yourself with other parishioners to gather regularly (weekly) to share your journey in Faith.
• Your relationship with God and His Church is the most important priority of your earthly life.

In earthly families that function well, there is a common expectation of participation. No properly functioning family will allow its members to live only for themselves. If that were to happen, the good parents would take immediate action to not only correct the selfish behavior but reinforce the standard for love and the benefit of all.

This is a standard we need to vocalize in our parishes. Granted, a parish family is much different than a family unit, but that does not mean that we can’t present the vision for what we need to be. We must once again regain the identity that when we enter into communion with God, we also enter communion with others. We are truly His children and a part of an Eternal Family that is far greater than anything else on earth, even our own families.